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Episode 2 Part 1: The Self-Fulfilling Prophesized Hero
Last
time
on
The
Main
Character:
an
assailant
chased
after
me
and
I’m
killed
by
a
bike.
What,
not
comprehensive
enough
for
you?
Well
then,
maybe
you
should
have
been
supporting
my
debut,
asshole!
Anyways,
back
to
the
show.
Where
the
hell
is
Bowtan!?
She’s
supposed
to
come
out
and
make
me
a
spirit
detective
by
now!
When
I
die
in
my
dreams,
she
always
comes.
And
then
I
become
an
action
hero
out
of
nowhere,
just
like
Yusuuke.
Damn
it
Bowtan,
where
are
you?
She
isn’t
coming,
is
she?
Then
I
really
am
dead.
Run
over
by
a
bicycle,
what
a
let-down.
How
could
Main
Character
die
like
this?
I’m
supposed
to
get
killed
by
some
bad
ass
OP
misanthrope
and
then
I’m
supposed
to
come
back
in
the
next
episode
with
demon
powers.
Ugh,
whatever...cue
the
opening.
I
look
into
the
sunlight.
Shit,
I
got
run
over
by
a
bike.
And
now
I’m
running
from
an
assailant
fruitlessly…fruitlessly.
Now
there’s
a
slide
show
of
a
bunch
of
people
I
still
don’t
know.
And
now
I
know
that
none
of
them
will
ever
join
my
team.
God
Damnit!
Then
my
hand
is
reaching
out
to
the
sky.
Grasping
for
life!
Now
all
the
villains
are
taking
up
my
screen-time!
And
that
son
of
a
bitch
isn’t
even
there!
But
then
I
jump
in
and
spontaneously
combust!
I’m
now
clenching
my
fist
on
top
of
a
mountain
of
graves.
Holy
shit
those
are
the
graves
of
my
classmates.
I’m
then
knocked
back
and
then
I
get
run
over
by
that
stupid
f’ing
bike!
I
then
get
sliced
to
ribbons
by
Assailant.
Yeah,
that’s
his
name.
No
matter
what,
I
am
dead.
And
there
is
only
one
reason
why.
It’s
because
of
that
bastard
guy!
He
killed
The
Main
Character!
Me
me
me!
The
Main
Character!
Hell
no!
I’m
The
Main
Character
and
now
I’m
dead!
Alright,
now
what?
A
black
void,
really?
The
prequel
was
right?
Damn
it!
Wait,
in
the
distance
I
can
see
a
light.
So
there
really
is
a
light
at
the
end
of
the
tunnel.
I
stand
up
and
run
towards
it.
I
then
realize
it’s
a
train.
Shit!
I
turn
around
and
run
the
opposite
way.
But
it’s
too
late.
It
smashes
right
into
me,
killing
me
a
second
time.
Well,
at
least
it’s
cooler
than
a
bike.
Oh
my
God,
I’m
being
materialized.
I’m
arriving
in
another
world.
And
I’m
freaking
naked.
There’s
a
big
black
ball
in
front
of
me
with
something
written
on
it:
“Your
life
is
over
you
bastards.
Now
it
belongs
to
me.
So,
there
you
have
it”.
Oh
great,
I’m
having
the
Gantzo
dream
again.
After
telling
me
to
kill
Kananade,
the
Angel
Beasts
alien,
the
ball
opens
up
and
reveals
a
rack
of
guns.
I
take
the
gun
and
aim
it
at
the
sleeping
guy
inside
the
ball.
His
head
blows
up.
I
really
need
to
have
some
free
domain
dreams
or
my
viewers
will
get
lost.
My
eyes
shoot
open
and
the
assailant
is
hovering
over
me.
He
takes
a
thermometer
out
of
my
mouth
and
lets
out
a
sigh
of
relief.
Great.
This
dream
is
even
weirder
than
the
last
one!
The
creature
held
its
forehead.
“You
almost
gave
me
a
heart
attack.
I
hardly
killed
you
in
time.
You
should
rest,
space-time-matter-gravity-dimension
travel
can
be
rather
stressful.”
I
swear,
the
spiky
stars
in
the
black
void
of
his
face
became
less
jagged.
“Good
morning,
Main!”
exclaims
Stalker,
right
on
top
of
my
lap.
Her
sparkly
drool
lands
right
on
my
bare
chest.
Wasn’t
she
dead?
Oww,
that
hurts
so
much!
I
try
to
curse
at
her,
but
words
just
came
out
in
a
jumble.
“So,
nurse,
will
he
be
okay?”
asks
Best
Friend
in
the
corner,
slitting
his
wrist.
There
he
is.
With
those
gorgeous
caring
crimson
eyes!
I
don’t
want
this
dream
to
end!
“My
husband
will
be
fine.
Dying
can
be
stressful
but
thankfully
none
of
the
wounds
he
suffered
are
fatal.
He
just
needs
rest
and
some
TLC,”
says
Stalker
with
that
same
airy
smile.
She
wipes
her
drool-soaked
hand
up
my
arm.
This
girl
is
freaking
nuts!
Wait,
why
does
her
saliva
actually
feel
good?
I
turn
my
head
to
Best
Friend,
trying
to
say
something,
but
all
I
can
do
is
open
and
close
my
mouth
like
a
freaking
fish!
Best
Friend
turns
away
from
me
with
flushed
cheeks.
Seeing
me
so
pitiful
must
be
an
embarrassment.
But
when
he
looks
so
vulnerable
like
that
my
mind
can’t
help
but
wander.
“You
need
to
rest,”
says
Stalker,
drooling
in
my
mouth
and
dispelling
my
fantasy.
This
is
ridiculously
weird.
Even
as
a
fan
of
Mysterious
Girl
X,
I
do
not
approve
of
this!
Assailant
places
a
stool
on
the
ground
and
stands
atop
it.
This
guy
has
no
social
graces.
“Listen,
I
owe
you
all
an
apology.
I’m
a
broad-spectrum
assailant.
I’m
no
good
at
taking
out
single
targets,”
says
Assailant,
covering
his
flustered
face.
“Are
you
kidding.
You
did
a
great
job,
poppa!
You
didn’t
even
kill
everyone
in
the
whole
school.
It
was
only
a
classroom
of
casualties.
When
you
first
became
an
assailant,
you
killed
a
whole
city’s
worth
of
people
and
you
let
the
hero
get
away!”
she
exclaims
before
giggling
childishly.
Assailant
joins
in
the
laughing
as
well.
Best
Friend
then
joins
the
laughing
train,
freaking
me
out
with
his
demonic
cackling.
I
leap
on
at
the
last
moment,
letting
out
a
very
frightened
awkward
chuckle.
Even
metaphorical
trains
are
unsettling
to
me.
The
only
exception
being
the
Cole
train!
“Dwelling
on
your
failures
will
only
hold
you
back,”
says
Best
Friend,
looking
miserable.
Wait!
My
arm!
I
look
to
my
side
to
see
I
haven’t
become
a
handicapable
hero.
I
feel
more
confused
than
when
I
first
finished
Evengelion!
What
just
happened?
And
why
do
I
feel
like
this
is
real?
Real
or
not,
everyone
is
looking
at
me.
Even
as
a
dying
patient
I
seize
the
spotlight!
I
am
so
freaking
awesome.
“You
probably
want
to
know
what’s
going
on,
don’t
you?”
asks
Best
Friend,
abruptly
looking
up
at
me.
His
shimmering
blood
red
eyes
were
staring
deep
into
my
bright
hazel
ones.
“I…um…yes!”
I
exclaim,
finally
grasping
the
power
of
speech.
Strange
my
throat
doesn’t
hurt
anymore.
“Well
yeah,
but
I
don’t
feel
like
explaining
it.
My
job
is
to
stand
here
and
look
cool.
Isn’t
that
what
you
said
that
fateful
day?”
he
asks,
turning
away
like
a
total
badass.
Shit,
this
isn’t
good.
If
he’s
this
awesome,
then
I’ll
lose
the
popularity
poll
again!
“We
should
at
least
introduce
ourselves.
I’m
Assailant,
the
village’s
chosen
murderer.
And
this
is
my
lovely
daughter…Stalker.
She
was
chosen
to
look
after
you
and
make
sure
nothing
ill
befell
you.”
“Well
she’s
as
successful
as
Yuko
Suckaki.
Your
little
princess
electrocuted
me!
And
as
for
you!
You
murdered
all
those
kids.
What
the
hell
is
your
problem?”
Stalker’s
cheeks
puffed
out.
“Hey,
my
Big
Daddy
tried
his
best!
I
know
you’re
shaken
up,
but
please
don’t
pick
on
him.”
“Your
pops
is
a
damn
murderer!
He’s
as
irredeemable
as
Minene
Uryuu!”
“When
you’re
angry
like
that,
your
nose
twitches
like
a
bunny’s.
I
can’t
bear
to
watch,”
says
Best
Friend
with
wide
eyes.
Shit,
now
we’re
both
embarrassed!
Assailant
makes
an
otherworldly
wheezing
sound,
which
I
think
is
him
clearing
his
throat.
“My
little
strawberry
told
me
all
about
you.
Not
many
boys
rub
bars
of
soap
on
their
nipples;
you’re
very
unique.
She
also
told
me
about
the
promise
you
made
that
day.
And
just
know,
if
you
break
that
promise
I’ll
kill
you
personally.
Oh,
but
I
already
did
kill
you,
how
ironic!”
he
exclaims
before
laughing
again.
Great.
Asshole
thinks
he’s
a
comedian.
To
make
matters
worse
I
never
made
her
a
damn
promise!
If
I
had,
then
I’m
sure
a
flashback
would
happen
to
remind
me.
The
area
shifts
and
gets
coated
in
a
sepia
tint.
I
see
myself
showering.
Why
is
my
flashback
in
3rd
person?
Why
are
they
always
in
3rd
person!?
Wait,
there!
I
notice
a
girl
peeking
at
me
from
the
window
outside.
She’s
muttering
to
herself.
“Yeah
yeah
yeah!”
I
cheer,
holding
an
imaginary
mike
to
my
mouth.
She
blushes
and
then
faints.
No
way
does
that
count!
I
was
clearly
singing
to
myself
and
there’s
no
way
she
thought
I
could
hear
her!
This
is
some
grade
A
human
shit!
Assailant
leans
over
me.
“Is
he
dreaming
while
awake?”
“He’s
having
flashbacks,”
says
Best
Friend.
“He
experiences
them
often,
but
thankfully
not
as
often
as
Noruto.
They
are
no
doubt
caused
by
the
terrible
thing
that
happened
to
him.”
“Father
dearest,
you
dropped
your
name
tag.”
Stalker
hops
on
the
stool
and
places
a
sticker
that
says
‘Hi,
I’m
Assailant’
on
her
dad’s
robe.
“Wait,
your
name
really
is
Assailant,
and
she
is
Stalker?”
I
ask
with
baffled
flabbergaspism.
Yeah,
I
don’t
care
if
it’s
not
a
real
word,
I’m
that
freaking
surprised
right
now.
“Our
names
are
whatever
you
deem
them
to
be.
As
long
as
you
live,
we
are
in
your
debt.
But
don’t
worry,
just
in
case
you
fail,
we’ve
already
dug
you
a
grave.
My
cupcake
paid
for
it
all
by
herself.”
He
squeezes
her
cheeks
with
the
blades
that
came
out
from
his
hand.
“Pops,
stop.
You’re
cutting
me,”
says
Stalker,
giggling
as
she
pulled
away.
“My
apologies,
sweetums.”
Well
at
least
I
know
where
she
gets
her
strange
nickname
giving
quirk
from.
Assailant
turns
to
face
me.
“You
are
hero
number
thirteen
thirteen
thirteen
thirteen
thirteen
thirteen
thirteen
thirteen
thirteen
thirteen
thirteen
thirteen
thirteen.
Wow,
thirteen
thirteens…you
won’t
last
long,”
he
says
with
a
nervous
chuckle.
“Don’t
say
that,
Papa
Bear.
I
was
chosen
as
his
Guardian
Angel,
after
all.
Come
to
think
of
it,
you’re
my
thirteenth
hero,”
says
Stalker
with
a
smile.
“My
name
is
Main,
Main
Character.
Don’t
you
dare
just
slap
a
number
on
me!”
I
yelled
furiously.
“Then
that
makes
it
fourteen
thirteens,
hence
breaking
the
misfortunate
hex,”
says
Best
Friend.
“My
love
puppy
is
right!”
Stalker
stands
tall,
pushing
out
her
washboard
of
a
chest.
“Giving
him
a
number
makes
him
even
more
likely
to
have
a
horribly
painful
and
gruesome
death.
We
have
to
believe
in
the
him
that
believes
in
himself.”
Her
eyes
were
sparkling
like
a
beautiful
blond
shirtless
vampire
boy
but
she
totally
whiffed
that
reference.
“Throw
your
concerns
into
the
furnace.
Main’s
the
most
reliable
person
I
know,”
says
Best
Friend
with
a
smile.
Glasses
Kid
rushes
into
the
room.
“You
all
didn’t
explain
everything
to
him
yet,
did
you?”
“To
do
so
would
be
to
deprive
you
of
oxygen.
The
floor
is
yours,”
says
Best
Friend,
hoisting
the
kid
up
onto
the
stool.
“What
are
you
doing
here!?
You
were
decapitated!
I
saw
you
die.
How
are
any
of
you
alive?”
I
ask,
glaring
at
him.
Glasses
Kid
adjusts
his
glasses.
“It
must
be
so
hard
living
with
such
a
simplistic
mind.
Worry
not,
plebian!
I’ve
written
a
whole
four-page
Times
New
Roman
double
spaced
A.P.A.
format
report
all
about
it.
It
will
answer
every
question
you
never
had
about
Main
Character.
Oh,
and
Glasses
Kid
is
not
my
real
name.
I’m
Four
Eyes,
the
Seven-Year-Old
Uber
Genius!”
he
exclaims,
literally
patting
himself
on
the
back.
“You’re
Glasses
Kid
now.
Let’s
hear
your
report,”
says
Stalker
as
she
licks
the
scratched-up
soles
of
my
foot.
Can’t
let
her
find
out
that
my
feet
are
my
weak
point.
I
don’t
trust
her
a
smidge.
Glasses
Kid
fixes
his
glasses
and
clears
his
throat.
He
turns
to
face
me
with
an
arrogant
look.
“I’ve
simplified
the
document
so
that
your
still-developing
mind
can
grasp
its
concepts.
First
off,
the
train
you
were
hit
by
in
your
dream
is
a
mental
manifestation
of
your
ill
feelings
towards
your
parents.”
“How
can
you
know
what
I
was
dreaming
about?”
I
interrupted.
Stalker
covers
her
face.
“Sorry.
I
kinda
said
it
to
everyone
while
you
were
sleeping.”
I
shake
my
head.
“Then
how
do
you
know!?”
Glasses
Kid
taps
my
head.
“Let
me
finish!
You
asked
what
happened,
after
all.”
“Fine,
whatever.
Ramble
on,”
I
say
with
an
annoyed
look.
Glasses
Kid
nods.
“You’ve
never
been
able
to
forgive
your
parents
for
your
remarkable,
yet
inconvenient
birth.
Because
of
this
you
always
dream
up
fantasy
worlds
that
are
just
cheap
knock
offs
of
the
anime
you
watch.
Lacking
creativity
and
possessing
below
average
intelligence,
you
focus
all
your
brainpower
into
your
drive.
You
lack
direction,
which
is
where
I
come
in.”
The
arrogance
exuding
from
him
is
palpable.
“I
am
the
object
of
your
envy,
as
well
as
your
mentor.
In
this
sense
you
are
my
apprentice.”
“If
you
mock
him
once
more,
your
head
shall
slide
off
your
shoulders,”
says
Best
Friend,
whipping
out
a
knife.
Oh,
I
get
it.
Glasses
Kid
is
like
that
arrogant
incompetent
character
that
calls
the
main
character
his
sidekick.
Those
are
always
the
worst,
except
for
Kaido
Momoda,
that
man
is
a
freaking
legend!
“His
words
are
empty.
Proceed,
Glasses
Kid,”
I
say,
calming
my
best
friend.
“Sure
thing.
Best
Friend
is
more
than
your
shield
though,
he
is
your
right
arm.
He
acts
for
you
and
only
you.
And
he
has
decided
to
carry
the
burden
of
the
truth
by
himself.
He
is
carrying
all
of
your
misery
and
his
own.
Oh,
and
the
reason
he
cuts
his
wrist
is
because
it
releases
endorphins.
It’s
not
because
he’s
suicidal,
that’s
a
complete
coincidence.
You
know
Main,
the
feelings
you
have
for
Best
Friend
might
be
more
akin
to
family
than
friendship.
He’s
like
a
brother…isn’t
he?”
Best
Friend
rolls
his
eyes.
Glasses
kid’s
face
relaxes.
“After
finding
out
that
your
mother
planned
to
shoot
you
out
the
window,
he
swore
vengeance
against
your
parents.
You
see,
they
didn’t
want
to
get
swept
up
in
the
controversy
of
abortion
so
they
decided
to
improvise.
Anyways,
once
he
finally
tracked
them
down,
he
took
the
second
third
of
your
heart-shaped
amulet
and…”
“You’ve
said
too
much.”
Best
Friend
looms
over
Glasses
Kid.
“If
you
wish
to
keep
your
tongue,
you
will
end
my
story
there.”
“I’ll
uh,
jump
to
the
next
character
then,”
says
Glasses
Kid,
wiping
away
a
bead
of
sweat.
I
turn
to
Best
Friend.
“Is
what
he’s
saying
true?”
“As
if
that
arrogant
child
knows
more
about
me
than
you,”
says
Best
Friend
with
a
calming
smile.
He’s
right.
The
kids
just
blowing
hot
air.
“Now
to
continue
on.”
Glasses
Kid
reaches
in
my
backpack
and
pulls
out
Boobs.
Thank
goodness.
She’s
still
alive.
He
looks
at
the
pillow
and
shrugs.
He
then
turns
to
Stalker.
“Let’s
focus
at
the
matter
at
hand.
Stalker,
you’re
up!”
“That’s
me!”
exclaims
the
girl,
rubbing
her
glittery
spittle
on
my
legs.
“Can
you
stop
spitting
on
me?”
I
ask
with
a
glare.
“But
I’m
your
nurse,”
she
said,
pointing
to
her
nurse
cap.
Glasses
Kid
claps
his
hands
together
to
get
my
attention.
“Stalker
is
your
assigned
guardian
angel.
She
was
chosen
by
this
village
in
order
to
locate
and
protect
a
new
hero.
Guided
by
the
aroma
of
your
baseless
drive,
she
found
you
showering.
Seeing
your
bare
body
and
your
overflowing
confidence
caused
her
to
fall
madly
in
love
with
you.
This
is
where
the
promise
comes
into
play.
While
looking
in
the
mirror
you
said
to
yourself:
‘No
matter
what,
I
will
become
a
great
hero.
Oh
my
God,
I
am
so
sexy.
Just
look
at
my
muscles.
Oh,
and
I
am
not
going
to
die
a
virgin!
Yes,
I’ll
get
laid
and
have
a
ton
of
kids!
That
is
a
promise!’
Since
she
was
behind
you,
unbeknownst
to
you
of
course,
she
assumed
you
were
talking
to
her.
In
truth,
you
were
making
a…”
He
looks
over
at
Best
Friend,
who
is
sharpening
his
throwing
knives
“…manly
promise
to
yourself,
so
you
would
find
the
power
to
keep
on
living.”
That
flashback
I
had
was
wrong.
Now
that
I
think
back,
she
wasn’t
muttering
to
herself.
She
was
just
breathing
heavily.
I’m
the
one
who
made
the
promise.
“Why
is
he
crying?”
Best
Friend
held
his
dagger
to
Glasses’
Kids
scrawny
throat.
“You
don’t
need
to
shed
his
blood.
These
are
happy
tears.
Stalker,
you
really
want
to
help
me
fulfill
my
promise
to
myself.”
“Wrong.
It’s
a
misunderstanding,”
says
Glasses
Kid.
“No,
you’re
wrong!”
yelled
Stalker,
with
a
pointy
figure
of
objection.
“I
know
he
was
talking
to
himself,
but
I
absolutely
will
help
him
fulfill
his
promise,”
she
says
with
eyes
shining
like
green
rupees,
no
wait,
gold
rupees.
Glasses
Kid,
no
longer
feeling
threatened,
continues
to
ramble
on.
“Stalker
tried
to
prolong
your
life
for
as
long
as
possible,
failing
the
third
grade
as
many
times
as
it
took
to
stay
by
your
side.
But
then
you
made
the
promise
to
Best
Friend
that
the
two
of
you
would
graduate
together.
This
of
course
caused
her
to
study.
Poor
girl,
she
really
believed
in
you.
Once
she
got
an
A,
the
horror
on
her
face
was
palpable.
She
knew
that
she
would
be
separated
from
you.
Which
of
course
meant
her
father
was
going
to
come
and
kill
you.
The
reason
you
never
noticed
her
is
because
the
hero’s
guardian
angel
is
invisible
to
the
hero
they
are
protecting.
Best
Friend
never
mentioned
her
name
so
the
empty
desk
facing
you
was
never
questioned.
Knowing
that
the
day
of
prophecy
had
arrived,
hand-picked
by
Assailant
himself
out
of
a
jar
of
a
bunch
of
rolled
up
papers,
he
decided
to
dispel
the
cloaking
hex
around
her.
This
is
why
you
were
able
to
see
her
that
one
day
only.
Moving
on.
She
zapped
you
in
order
to
give
you
super
speed.
That
is
why
you
were
able
to
almost
outrun
Assailant.”
Okay.
How
good
is
this
little
brat?
What
he’s
saying
makes
sense…I
think.
“Focus,
Main.
Your
teacher
is
talking.
Now
that
you
know
her
true
feelings,
you
must
be
wondering
how
you
got
here.
The
answer
is
Assailant,
our
final
character.
He
is
a
very
specialized
assassin.
Anyone
killed
by
him
outside
of
this
dimension
will
be
magically
teleported
to
this
village.
So,
to
protect
his
daughter
from
Best
Friend,
he
killed
her.
Thus,
bringing
her
home
safe
and
sound.
It’s
rather
admirable
actually.
He
sliced
her
in
two…what
a
great
father!
Taking
into
consideration
that
he
looks
nothing
like
his
daughter,
I
presume
he
was
transformed
into
this
bizarre
entity.
He
was
most
likely
chosen
by
the
village
to
be
their
assailant.
To
become
one,
he
had
to
sacrifice
his
humanity.
By
seeking
to
escape
his
own
reality,
his
body
transformed
into
a
tool
of
inter-dimensional
travel.
The
mind
is
the
most
powerful
force
in
the
universe,
after
all.”
Glasses
Kid
taps
his
forehead
and
hops
onto
the
stool.
“Once
his
daughter
was
three,
she
was
sent
to
Earth
to
locate
you.
She
gave
him
updates
every
night,
telling
him
how
much
she
loved
you.
She
always
asked
him
why
you
had
to
die.
But
the
village
did
not
permit
him
to
tell
her.
So,
he
merely
says.
‘He
must
die
so
that
we
can
attain
salvation.’
So-”
I
glare
at
the
arrogant
kid.
“No
way
you
can
just
assume
what
they
said
in
the
past.”
“Of
course
not.
I’m
paraphrasing.
We’re
nearing
the
end
of
the
story.
For
years
Stalker
betrayed
her
entire
village
for
your
love,
how
romantic.
And
yet
you
still
died.
She
was
furious
when
she
heard
the
news,
but
delighted
once
she
saw
you
here.
The
reason
the
information
was
kept
from
her
was
to
strengthen
her
trust
with
her
father.
This
village
was
founded
by
trust
and
thus
trust
sustains
it.
And
don’t
worry
about
your
classmates,
they
were
all
returned
back
to
our
world.
The
only
condition
being
that
I
stay
here
and
provide
you
assistance.”
Why
didn’t
he
start
with
that?
Well,
I
guess
I
didn’t
really
save
anyone.
Still,
I’m
relieved.
Those
lucky
little
twerps
get
to
return
home
their
loving
parents.
“Tasty.”
Stalker
licks
my
tears.
“Happy
tears!
Happy
tears!”
I
exclaim
as
Best
Friend
readies
his
blade.
Stalker
turns
to
Glasses
Kid.
“That’s
not
all
correct,”
she
says
softly.
“I
zapped
him
to
knock
him
out.
I
didn’t
want
him
to
suffer.
I
realized
he
wasn’t
going
to
run
at
that
point.
I
just…I
didn’t
know
what
to
do.”
Her
eyes
release
a
torrent
of
tears.
“Dai-jo-bu.
I’m
fine.
No
need
to
cry.”
I
made
a
funny
face
to
make
her
giggle.
Glasses
Kid
points
at
Stalker
with
a
slight
blush.
“The
cuteness
of
that
giggle
won’t
make
me
ignore
the
hole
in
your
logic.
How
can
Main
outrun
a
trained
assassin?”
“Well,
Daddy
Death
is
kinda
heavier
than
most
of
the
assassins
since
he
has
so
many
weapons.
And
he
was
wounded.
As
for
that
incredible
speed…that
was
from
these
thick
thighs,”
she
says,
putting
saliva
on
her
face
before
using
it
to
rub
my
legs.
“Does
that
mean,
everything
else
he
says
was
right?
How
did
he
figure
it
out?”
I
ask
with
wide
eyes.
“Come
now.
All
this
is
mere
conjecture.
Anyways,
I
gladly
accepted
their
offer.
After
all,
no
award
is
greater
than
knowledge.
This
entire
world
is
a
collection
of
new
facts
and
ideas.
I
can’t
help
but
yearn
to
investigate
it.
I
also
want
to
see
how
you
develop,
Main.
And
that’s
the
gist
of
my
first
hypothesis.
I
have
eight
other
equally
lengthy
and
just
as
possible
assertions
if
you
would
like
to
hear
more,”
says
Glasses
Kid,
adjusting
his
big
circular
glasses.
This
little
bastard
talks
more
than
Ishiduh
Uryu!
He
read
me
like
a
Wykipedia
summary.
“That’s
quite
alright.
You’ve
made
an
exceptional
analysis.
We
haven’t
told
you
anything
yet
about
this
world.
How
do
you
know
so
much?”
asks
Assailant
in
awe.
Glasses
Kid
hops
off
the
stool.
“That
was
a
mere
string
of
connected
inferences.
They
are
backed
up
by
evidence,
not
facts.
Truth
is
relative,
so,
in
the
end
it’s
all
sloppy
speculation.
I
hope
I
adhered
to
your
customs.
I
made
my
entire
report
centered
around
Main,
as
a
sign
of
respect
to
your
beliefs,”
says
Glasses
Kid
with
a
bow.
“So,
are
you
my
brother?”
I
ask
Best
Friend.
“Ask
yourself
that
question.
Blood
is
irrelevant
when
compared
to
bonds,”
says
Best
Friend,
sucking
the
blood
out
of
his
wound.
Always
so
mysterious
and
sexy.
“Alright,
so
this
is
another
world
then?
And
I
was
transported
here,
right?
I
want
to
know
about
this
place,”
I
told
Assailant.
“The
village
chief
will
be
back
soon.
He
will
explain
exactly
what
you
need
to
know
when
he
arrives.
For
the
time
being,
all
you
need
to
know
is
that
you
are
our
prophesized
hero,”
says
Assailant
with
a
bow.
The
guy
who
killed
me
is
now
bowing
to
me…I
can’t
even
think
of
a
reference
for
this.
Oh
no,
my
head
hurts.
How
can
I
process
all
this
madness?
“If
you
didn’t
save
Main’s
life
from
that
drunk
biker,
I’d
cut
you
down
where
you
stand,”
says
Best
Friend,
glaring
at
assailant.
That’s
right!
He
didn’t
kill
me.
He
teleported
me.
This
follows
plenty
of
tropes
and
it
solidifies
my
role
as
a
hero.
“I’m
not
going
to
give
up
on
your
promise,”
says
Stalker,
giving
me
a
sweet
kiss
on
the
cheek.
You
know,
looking
at
her
with
a
new
perspective…she’s
rather
cute.
And
she
really
does
care
about
me.
If
I
play
my
cards
right,
put
on
a
little
charm
and
lower
my
standards
a
bit…I
might
be
able
to
make
her
my
friend.
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